Learning how to control our tongue seems to be among the hardest things for us to do. Only through the infilling of the Holy Spirit can we learn to control it. But it begins with cleaning the inside of the cup. Renewing our inner man, growing in love and learning to love the worst of our enemies.
But I say to you who are hearing: Love your enemies, do good to those hating you. Bless those cursing you, and pray for those insulting you. And to him who hits you on the one cheek, offer the other also. And from him who takes away your outer garment, do not withhold the inner garment either. And give to everyone who asks of you. And from him who takes away what is yours do not ask it back. And as you wish men should do to you, you also do to them in the same way. And if you love those loving you, what favour have you? For sinners, too, love those loving them. And if you do good to those doing good to you, what favour have you? For even sinners do the same. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive back, what favour have you? For even sinners lend to sinners to receive as much back. Rather, love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting none in return. And your reward shall be great, and you shall be sons of the Most High. Because He is kind to the thankless and wicked ones. Therefore be compassionate, as your Father also is compassionate. Luk 6:27-36
“For we all stumble in many matters. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle the entire body. Look, we put bits in the mouths of horses, for them to obey us, and we turn their body. Look at the ships too: although they are so big and are driven by strong winds, they are turned by a very small rudder wherever the pilot intends. So too the tongue is a little member, yet boasts greatly. See how a little fire kindles a great forest! And the tongue is a fire, the world of unrighteousness. Among our members the tongue is set, the one defiling the entire body, and setting on fire the wheel of life, and it is set on fire by GěHinnom. For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and creature of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by mankind. But no man is able to tame the tongue. It is unruly, evil, filled with deadly poison. With it we bless our Elohim and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of Elohim. Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brothers, this should not be so. Does the fountain send forth the sweet and the bitter from the same opening? My brothers, is a fig tree able to bear olives, or a grapevine figs? So neither is a fountain able to make salt and sweet water.” James 3:2-12 TS2009
When we can look an angry man in the face and return a soft answer, it will turn away his wrath. When I’ve put it into practice it worked more than once.
We have to retrain our thinking based on the word of Elohim so that we do not react and return evil for evil.
Come, children, listen to me: I will teach you the fear of Adonai. Who is the one who delights in life, and loves to see good days? Keep your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking treachery. Depart from evil and do good. Seek shalom and pursue it. The eyes of Adonai are on the righteous, and His ears are attentive to their cry. Psalms 34:12-16
Remember, what ever another person says or does is about them. Not you. Your reaction to them whether good or evil is about you. We can retrain our thinking so that we do not retaliate.
Finally, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, tenderhearted, humble-minded. Do not repay evil for evil or insult for insult, but give a blessing instead—it is for this reason you were called, so that you might inherit a blessing. For, “The one who loves life, wanting to see good days, must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit. He must turn away from evil and do good. He must seek shalom and pursue it. For the eyes of Adonai are on the righteous and His ears open to their prayer, but the face of Adonai is against those who do evil.” 1 Peter 3:8-12 TS2009
Life is a matter of perspective. We can choose our behavior as we transform our thinking. We have to go by what we know, not what we feel and base our actions on knowledge. If you have damaged emotions you can be healed. I recommend counseling with a Pastor/Psychologist if you are in need of emotional healing. I did and I gained my self esteem and emotional strength during that process. The emotional strength I gained actually caused me to be more secuire as I sought the love of Messiah that drove the fear out of me. Fear is the main cause of many of our problems, anxiety, anger, etc. Perfect love casts out all fear. If you have fear you also have torment and this is not what Elohim wants for us.
Messiah told us to cleanse the inside of the cup and the whole thing will be clean. We have to deal with our inner man, before our outer man reflects Messiah.
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalms 147:3 TS2009
Search your bible for every instance of the word Love and learn of Messiah’s Love. It is the Father’s love because he and the Father are one, the same Spirit, Echad in Hebrew which means plural oneness. The Father has good thoughts toward us even though we are sinners. His love has cleansed me in so many ways and healed me from within so that the words that come out of my mouth now are not what they would have been prior to healing. He can do a work in your also if you submit all your ways to him.
For I know the plans that I have in mind for you,” declares Adonai, “plans for shalom and not calamity—to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call on Me, and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me, when you will search for Me with all your heart. Then I will be found by you,” says Adonai, “and I will return you from exile, and gather you from all the nations and from all the places where I have driven you,” says Adonai, “and I will bring you back to the place from which I removed you as captives into exile.” Jeremiah 29:11-14 TS2009